Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Late nights

It was so nice to have a three day weekend. I spent a lot of time with friends and had my fill of grill food. I don't think I have recovered from staying up late on Saturday, Sunday and Monday night. It is awesome to be able to talk with friends until late but I always pay for it later. I was better on Monday night going to bed. After I got back from Borders, I stayed up a little and talked to Mr. Sunrise.

The frustrating thing that happened this weekend was having our computer crash. I have missed reading everyone's blog. The computer is being fixed and should be running again on Wednesday night, hopefully. Thanks to T for allowing me to use her computer today. I love the feel of the keyboard, by the way.

Hope everyone had a fun Memorial Day!

Thursday, May 26, 2005

I wanna be more like Dust

Have you heard the praise song, "I wanna be more like you, Jesus, I wanna be more like you.?" This song was popular when Dust (or Mr. Sunrise) and I were in college. His roommate would tease him and sing to him, " I wanna be more like Dust."

I think inadvertantly, I have become more like Dust. (and hopefully more like Jesus too). I made a somewhat sarcastic remark to Dust the other day and he said that I am starting to sound like him. I feel like Dust is inside my head now. I cannnot get you, I do not want you, out of my head!-Newsboys.

In some ways this is a good thing. He has made me start to question things rather than to take someone's word as the truth. Now when someone starts to quote something from the pulpit, I will look it up in the Bible to see if what they are saying is accurate. I would have never done that before I met Dust.

Dust and I have this ongoing debate on whether he is a pessimist or a realist. He thinks he is a realist and I think he is a pessimist. I know he has been thinking about blogging about this so I don't want to ruin it. The other day Dust and I were talking and I said reality hurts doesn't it. He was pleased with that reply because it backs up his case for being a realist. I like to live in a fairy tale world and sometimes Dust bursts my bubble. With Dust's influence, I am coming out of my fairy tale world and into reality.

Every now and then a "Dust" word will come out of my mouth. Take for instance the word inadvertantly that I used earlier. That is definately a Dust word. Other Dust words are: disparity, procured, and other intelligent sounding words. I obviously can't think of any smart words right now. It is past my bedtime.

I guess spouses have a tendency to rub off on each other. No pun intended. Yet another Dust trait I have picked up. Maybe some of my humor will rub off on him.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

the boat returns

When I was in upper-elementary school, my dad bought a boat. I thought it was so cool. There was a section in the front that you could walk-through and sit in. I assume there is a name for this, but I can't think of it at the moment. There were two windows, one in front of the driver and one for the passenger. Anyway, it was a distinct looking boat. The seats in the back could flatten out if someone wanted to sleep. There is a picture with me in the boat with my Garfield stuffed animal and my brother has his stuffed monkey named Bimbo. When my brother and I were teenagers, we were too embarrassed to go out in the boat with our parents. As a result, the boat did not get used very much.

Around the time I started college, my parents had a yard sale. My dad decided to sell the boat and use the money to help pay for my tuition so I wouldn't have to take a loan out. My dad knew of the people that he sold it to because they lived near us.

Last Saturday, my parents were driving by a place that sold boats and decided to stop and look. My dad looked one over and said that it looked a lot like the boat we used to have. After all, it did have a distinct look. He went inside and asked about the boat and said it looked like the one he had about nine years ago that he sold to Mr. Michael. The salesman researched the paperwork on the boat and said you are right. The previous owner was Mr. Michael and he had it for nine years. Once my dad found out that it was in fact his old boat, he had to buy it right then.

I am glad that my dad got his boat back. I can't wait to take a ride in it!

Monday, May 23, 2005


What does it mean to be on-fire for God? Last night's sermon was about people that were on-fire for God. The person would be passionate about telling other people about Jesus. Another characteristic would be the hunger the person would have for God's word.

Do you have to be the person that jumps up and down in front of the altar to be considered being on-fire for God? I was observing how people worship last night. There were the ones that were down in front of the altar area that were very extroverted in their worship. When the preacher calls everyone to come up front for more worship, I usually get distracted if I am up there. Everyone is cramed in and I try not to hit anybody. I have a hard time concentrating because of all the loud noises. I usually get more from God if I am in my pew worshiping or kneeling down in my pew. Sometimes I think that maybe people will look down on me because I stay in my pew. Will others be worried about my spiritual condition because I am not jumping up and down in front of the altar? Then I realize that this is just silly thinking. I wonder if there is a correlation between a person's personality and the way they worship God. I am sure there is. The preacher last night told us to be real with God. I was being real with God in my own way.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

A chapter closed

Last night I had to tell the girls in the program that I teach at church that I wouldn't be their teacher anymore. I was really nervous about it. When I told them that they would be getting a new teacher in June after promotions some of them said, "But you can't leave Golden." It was really sweet and a lot them gave me hugs.

Stars is a three year program for 3rd-5th grade girls. I have the honor of crowning two of the girls next Wednesday night. I have had one of the girls in my class for all three years. I am very proud of her and it has been neat watching her grow up. The other girl I have had in class for maybe one year. She finished the program in record time! I am very proud of her also.

I decided to resign as sponsor for many reasons. First of all, I have peace from God that this is what I needed to do. I had been having trouble maintaining control of the classroom. I felt defeated every Wednesday night and came home a nervous wreck. I cried and usually could not go to sleep those nights. A lot of this had to do with the fact that they couldn't find anyone to help me. I had to take roll, teach a lesson, do crafts, help girls with worksheets, and listen to the 15 of them say their memory verses/honor steps. Talk about a handful! It could have also been a classic case of burn out.

I want to believe that I have made a difference in the lives of the girls. I look back to see if I have let God shine through me and that my words have been His words. I haven't been perfect, but noone can be. I am closing this chapter of my life and look forward to what God has for me in the future. As my last act as sponsor, I will be sewing many badges on sashes this weekend. Guess what Mr. Sunrise will be doing this weekend also!

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Condemning, closed-minded, and stubborn

What makes a person decide to change from the religion that he/she was raised in to pursue another religion or church denomination? I have heard some people say it is in their pursuit for truth. For me, truth is in God's Holy Word-The Bible.

I have been thinking about this recently because my husband and I have three friends now that are attending a church that is not the denomination that they were brought up in. I know that there will not be denominations in heaven and we should all unite in what we have in common. I have never said anything to these friends about it until recently.

A good friend of mine told me that she was attending a messianic jewish church now. She asked me if I was mad and I told her no. I told her I may be a little dissappointed because we wouldn't have the bond of attending the same denomination church. If she is happy and is where she is supposed to be than that is great. She sent an email about how she is observing the passover and the feast of unleavened bread now. She explained what it was all about and said that "these feasts are listed in scripture as to be celebrated forever wherever Israel shall live." The tone of the email to me felt like she was telling everyone that they should celebrate the feast of unleavened bread. I responded to her email with some scripture verses. Here is one of them-Colossians 2: 16,17. "Therefore do not let anyone judge you by what you eat or drink, or with regard to a religious festival, a new moon celebration or a Sabbath day. These are a shadow of the things that were to come; the reality, however is found in Christ." She did not email me back after that. I sent her an email asking if she was mad at me. She sent me an email last night saying that she wasn't so much mad but that she had given up on me. She said that I had been condemning, closed-minded, and stubborn. I have never been called those three words before. I told her it was fine if she wanted to celebrate the feasts, but that she shouldn't tell others that they need to. If standing up for what you believe in is being closed -minded, than maybe I am.

My friend told me to never write her back again. She said that she will see me in heaven, but that we have too many differences to continue our friendship. I am very sad at this loss.

Saturday, May 14, 2005

Boredom, Boxes, and Bicycles

A friend of mine was telling me that on the occasional times she left her kids home alone they would complain about being bored. She limited their video watching and I believe cut their television out. (that is a good thing). Another friend commented that when she complained of being bored as a child, her mother would say all the different chores you could do. At that moment, I thought about my childhood and what my brother and I would do when we were bored.

Actually, I don't remember being that bored because my brother was extremely creative. J and I had our own big box that our dad flipped over and cut holes in so we could put our head and arms through. It made us kind of look like robots. We would also pretend that the box was our motorhome and run around the house and yard in it. Yet another use of the box was our "General Store." We would sit inside the box and would have stamps, stickers, etc. for sale on the top of the box. We would take turns shopping at each other's store. It seems like we basically swapped pennies from our piggy bank.

Another great pastime was riding our bicycles behind my dad when he was mowing. We never got close enough to him to be dangerous. Our family had a huge square yard out in the country so there was plenty of room for us to do that. We lived in a white farm house out in the middle of nowhere. (from K-6th grade for me)

All of this happened before Nintendo, Playstation, and X-box. It was also before we had a VCR in the home. The television we would watch in the summer was "The Andy Griffith" show at noon. I realize now how much television and movies dominate my life. My goal for the summer is to be creative and have projects to do instead of sitting in front of the tube. I will begin after my season finales are over. : )

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

college friends

Last night, my husband's college roommate came over for a visit. I hadn't seen him in almost 5 years. He was pretty much the same person except for one detail. He had a ponytail which he took out so I could see his long hair. In college he had the typical clean-cut short hair. Quite a change! Hi! if you're reading this J. Hey J, I bet you could get a role playing Jesus in a church play.

He told stories about driving around the mountains in CA and CO. Apparently he loves to do that sort of thing. I don't see the fun in just driving up mountains to see how far you can go. He attempted driving a road that was not meant for public use and got stuck. Trying to find help in a deserted area was difficult. Everything worked out ok for him though.

It is nice to see friends from college again. I think for the most part people stay the same except for minor details like long hair for instance.

Monday, May 09, 2005

Phantom of the Opera

I have a tendency to judge a book (or music) by its cover. I have always written off musicals and operas because I think they look boring. I can never understand opera singing and I don't have the patience to listen to it. Recently I have realized that I need to become a well-rounded person and be somewhat cultured. I have heard that the "Phantom of the Opera" is wonderful. Is it a musical or opera or play or all of the above? Anyway, it has been made into a movie and has been released on DVD.

My family and I watched the "Phantom of the Opera" yesterday on DVD. My brother was excited about watching it so that is why we rented it. He is an awesome singer and is more cultured than I. I was immediately engrossed in the plot of the story. "Who was the man and woman at the auction and why did the man buy the monkey music box?," I thought. The soundtrack was unbelievable! I recognized some of the songs but never knew that they were from the "Phantom." Some of the music really calmed me and I hadn't felt that peaceful in awhile. My mother made the same comment. ("Think of me, think of me softly")

I have got to buy the soundtrack to the movie! Either that or buy the movie. Is there a "Phantom of the Opera" book I can read? I am also wondering if the DVD version is different than the play or musical. I am starting to get obsessed. Better distract myself with some regular television.

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Favorite '80's sitcoms

Thanks to Dash, I have been singing the Facts of Life theme song since his post. His post gave me the idea to share my favorite episodes of sitcoms from the '80's.

Growing Pains-starring Kirk Cameron. I loved the episode of the prom dance. Carol and Boner (Mike's best friend) were dancing together and they were both worried about what Mike would think. If I remember correctly Carol and Boner started liking each other. Mike was cool with them being together though. I kinda identified with Carol being the nerdy good-girl who got good grades.

Family Ties-starring Justine Bateman and Michael J. Fox. Mallory and Skip were in the Keaton's basement. Skip had a thing for Mallory. They realized that they were locked inside the basement and there was noone to help them out. It got really cold down there so they decided to put on the squirrel/chipmunk costume to keep warm. Mallory realized that maybe Skip was a nice guy after all. I also remember the Christmas past, present, & future episode with Alex Keaton. He saw how their traditional Christmas tree picture got started. They chose the same spot each year by the tree and hung the same decoration.

I enjoyed watching Mr. Belvedere, Silver Spoons, and Different Strokes. None of their episodes really stuck out to me. On the Facts of Life, I remember Jo and Blair always fighting/clashing. Blair was consumed with her looks and Jo didn't care much for that sort of thing. Tootie and Natalie had several fights also. I can't believe that they all shared a bedroom together! It was a nice size if I remember correctly. I also watched the Golden Girls (which I feel ashamed of now). Seeing some old reruns of the Golden Girls I couldn't believe how smutty it was. Most of the punch lines came from Sophia. Blanche was the slutty one.

Maybe this got you reminiscing about 1980's television. I was in elementary school in the '80's, so maybe some of my "well seasoned" friends will remember the episodes in greater detail.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

fear and peace

I have been reading "A Woman's Walk With God," by Elizabeth George. The first 3 chapters are about love, joy, and peace, the first three fruit of the spirit. I have just finished the peace chapter and it has stuck with me. I knew I needed this chapter before I began because I struggle with anxiety. Reading the first page made me more nervous, though. "90% of chronic patients today have one common symptom-fear." Now I am worried about getting a chronic illness because of my fear.

What I need to remember about peace: It is not the absence of problems. It has nothing to do with our circumstances, but everything to do with knowing we have a right relationship with God. "Fear is failure to trust our faithful Father." I need to be more like Mary who rested in God's presence, and less like Martha who worried (Luke 10:41). My pastor preached about that not too long ago.

To cultivate this fruit of the spirit, I will turn to the Lord and pray. I have tried to give my fears to the Lord, but somehow they keep coming back. I will try not to get caught up in fear and worry. I may have to daily release my fears to God.

Monday, May 02, 2005

things you've always wanted to do

Yesterday in Sunday School, we talked about things you should learn in your 20's. Some thirty year olds were saying that they were glad that they got to travel and fulfill their dreams in their 20's before they got married and settled down. This got me thinking, "Is there anything I want to do before I reach my 30's?"

It seems that everyone has the desire to travel. If I am honest with myself, I really don't have that desire. I am a creature of habit and ritual. I like sleeping in my own bed and keeping a schedule of when I eat meals. I tend to get "backed up" whenever we travel because my schedule is always thrown off. I don't adapt to change very well, and I am really not that flexible. This is something I am working on.

Things that I want to do are probably little things. Being shy, there has always been things that I wanted to try but was always too embarrassed because people would be looking at me. Last night I had the opportunity to jump on a trampoline. I have only been on a trampoline maybe a couple of times. I haven't had that much fun in awhile. It was like I was a kid again with no cares in the world except trying not to fall over the edge. It was kinda liberating. Mr. Sunrise watched me from inside the house. He commented to the people inside that he hadn't seen me smile that much in a long time. I am so glad that I swallowed my pride and did something that I wanted to do.