I have been thinking about some of the things that we discussed in Sunday School. We talked about how single people can fall into the trap of being self absorbed and non-accomodating to other people's schedules. Parents have to cater their schedules to take care of their children. Having children takes the focus off of you and onto your child. What got me thinking was some married couples that I know that seem very non-accomodating. Usually in marriage one learns that there is give and take in the relationship. If you love your spouse, you will let them plan an evening to do what they enjoy doing.
I have noticed a pattern in the life of one of my relatives. He hardly ever agrees to something that his spouse wants to do. I can't imagine being that way. If Dust was excited about going someplace, I would make sure that we would be able to do it. When they went on a vacation, the wife told the husband all the places that she wanted to stop at. She wanted him to find them on the map and make sure that they stopped. He didn't even try to locate the places and kept on driving because he wanted to make good time. She was very dissappointed. So, it is possible to be a selfish individual and be married with kids. Maybe the wife needs to do a better job at making her husband realize how selfish he is.
Both of the spouses I am talking about tend to be on the complaining side. They hardly ever have anything nice to say about any meal that you fix for them. If you put grits in front of him, he will say I hate grits. They complain if they don't get to eat at exactly noon for lunch and around five-o-clock for dinner. If the majority of the family wants to watch a tv show and she wants to sit and visit, the family will try to accommodate her.
One of my biggest pet peaves is selfish acting people. If I am around someone being totally selfish, I get so disgusted that I want to puke. I would love to tell them to grow up because they are acting like a child.
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6 comments:
I think Golden just wanted to type "puke." :)
Seriously, though, it is interesting to me that humble people tend to get humbler as they get older and selfish people tend to get more selfish as they get older. Little adjustments earlier in life can make such a difference.
Grits?! I haven't had grits in years....lol! I know you're from Spfd...but grits is more of a southern dish, isn't it??? =D
Seriously, though, I do KNOW exactly what you are talking about when you describe a selfish spouse. That was the way my marriage was to the point of him being "selfish" with food and leaving kids without anything to eat. This is when I had to draw the line!
You make me worry about finding a spouse who would be unselfish, now that I am getting older and he, obviously, would be older too...
I was waiting for either you or dust to have a commentary on sunday school. :)
I totally agree with you, golden. I can't imagine those relationships.
Puke is a good word. Sometimes we need to be reminded that we need to grow up. It's a good wake-up call.
hmmm. yep, I'm totally agreeing with you over here. but I think that even in a dating relationship you need to have some give and take. I'm one of those serious relationship people, so I tend to have relationships where you give and take.
ooohhh but another thing that's bad is when people never stick up for themselves and what they want to do. I'm a person that's full of ideas, so if the other person doesn't speak up or whatever we might always be doing what I want to do (although I try not to make it something the person hates....) And at some point, if the other person is just way too passive I don't think that I'm necessarily being selfish, I just have tons of ideas.
Christian making eating plans: "really I don't care which (restaurant, video etc...)..." BTW like your new Golden "heart of the fireball" picture. YOW!
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