"fear of rejection"

I bet the title "fear of rejection" may sound a bit weird because you immediately think of what a guy fears when he asks a girl out. I think the title can also be applied to what I am writing. It has to do with making new friends. I have a hard time asking someone to do something on the weekends with Dust and I because of a fear of rejection. Here is a story that happened to me that will illustrate my point.

A few years ago, a man Dust knew invited him to some event that he had tickets for. I thought it would be nice if I asked the woman relative of this man to do something. She said yes at first and I got excited to get to know her better. We were going to go to a movie. Later she asked if her sister could come. Of course I said yes. I did think it would be nice to get to know her too. A few days later, she asked if her best friend could come and also her sister's best friend. I couldn't really say no. I was hurt that they each wanted to bring their best friend. I thought the point of the whole night was to get to know each other better. I can't really get to know you if you have your best friend there.

Another story. Dust and I invited a couple to go out to eat with us. We paid for their meal as a gesture of kindness. We seemed to get along great. The conversation seemed to flow naturally. A few weeks later, I invited them over to our house. We played some games and talked. Since I had initiated two outings, I decided to wait for them to ask us to do something. That call or invite never came. I was really hurt. I don't know what happened.

I was thinking about all of this today because of some thoughts I had after Sunday School. We talked about the two conversations that happen when you are talking to someone.

the surface: whatever it is that our mouths are saying.
the heart: does it communicate that you like or dislike the person?

I realized that if I dislike someone, it does show up in the way that I communicate with that person. When I talked with the people in the above stories after the events happened, I communicated to them that I did not like them. I feel so bad about that now. They probably had no clue why I wasn't being that friendly with them. They probably think that I am stuck up. Maybe the moral of this story should be: if someone hurts you, let them know about it. I have a hard time telling someone that I was hurt by something that they did or did not do.